****NEW YORK CITY SHOWCASE (DESIGNER LINE OF CLOTHING)….see it all at SWELL

HERE ARE THE TRUE TALES AND FEATURES FOR THE MONTH OF OCTOBER. FOR A LATE BREAKING TRUE TALE FOR TODAY, JUST GO TO TODAY

****TWO WARS ARE BETTER THAN ONE…. some people die, some people make profits with u.s. army contracts. WAR

****THE GABBY CABBY FIELD OFFICE IN IRAQ (the largest staff of any media office in the middle east)….this month’s exclusive true tale is that if you join the united states navy submarine service you will get to give arab sheiks rides under the sea in the arabian gulf. it is presumed that the reason is to impress them in how we use their oil. most american taxpayers can’t afford to take a surface cruise after paying most of their income for the wars. by the way, the middle east wars are run by generals who are headquartered in florida.

****THE UNITED NATIONS GENERAL ASSEMBLY FILLED THE CITY WITH TRASH….or maybe it should be called “garbage.” as usual, the delegates and the united nations staffers were rude impolite and just plain arrogant in the beginning of october. traffic was a nightmare and even the generally calm new york city police looked like they were having a nervous breakdown. the secret service personnel were angry and nasty. they always are. the new york times didn’t report that some of the united nations folks went to brothels for their time off leisure. they didn’t use their own cars with distinctive plates. they used taxis. ooops.

****WHO DID IT?...our lips are sealed as a doctor or an attorney would be when asked about their clients.

**** “Several foreign ministers were detained at John F. Kennedy Airport while trying to fly home after the United Nations General Assembly meeting, prompting an apology from the State Department.”…. the number one complaint that taxi drivers get from tourists is about how nasty the transportation security people are at the airports. it is nice to see that they are equal opportunity thugs.

**** “Furious that fans are reselling their tickets online, the Yankees have started revoking the contracts of season-ticket holders and banning them from buying playoff seats this year.”….they probably sold their tickets because they couldn’t afford to go to the stadium and pay $5.00 for a hot dog and $4.50 for a soda. it is probably the most expensive place in the big apple to buy food or souvenirs.

**** “New federal regulations will make it easier to get rid of Canada geese - which have become a nuisance at parks, golf courses and other open spaces. The U-S Fish and Wildlife Service say it is relaxing the regulations covering Migratory Birds. New York City will now be permitted to kill Canada geese, and destroy their nests if they take up residency in a local area.”….birdie, birdie in the sky. dropping whitewash in my eye.

****WHEN CHECKING INTO A NEW YORK CITY HOTEL..take a look at the bed first. according to an official new york city report, bed bugs are all over the city in hotels. tell gabby.com which hotel you are going to book and you will be advised whether or not you are going to be eaten alive. no charge for this public service.

**** “A creepy handyman who secretly made hundreds of videotapes in restrooms at two Brooklyn high schools won't have to do a day in prison. The admitted voyeur got a no-jail deal that gives him probation and community service.”….we is thinking of making videos of people in the taxis that pee in a cup.

****OLD TIME RADIO (shows you might be too young to remember)….”luigi” was a fun show about an italian who came to the united states. it would not be considered politically correct today. THE PAST

****THE SNEAKY CAMERA (the hidden camera)….a growing collection of new yorkers are unaware that they are being watched by a certain taxi driver. new ones are added from time to time. take a peep at SNEAKY

****YENTA YACK FROM THE BACK OF THE HACK (what they are talking about in the yellow mobile conveyance lounge)…. “Playing the role of a woman scorned, Jeanine Pirro who is running for new york state attorney general (the highest law enforcement job in the state) confessed that she wanted to catch her husband fooling around - so she asked Bernard Kerik, who was Rudy Giuliani’s Police Commissioner and now current business partner, to plant a bug on the family boat.” however, the incident is more than a year old and the question is asked, how come mike garcia, the united states attorney for new york, is pursuing this matter just a few weeks before the election? the answer is simple. he was busy terrifying the gabby cabby about the donald rumsfeld lawsuit.

SPEAKING OF DONALD RUMSFELD, HE IS A CHEAT, EVEN AT HANDBALL…. this from the media….”Mr. Rumsfeld, often wins points because, after hitting a shot, he does not get out of the way so his opponent has a chance to return the ball, a practice known in squash as “clearing.” For the last six years, Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld has slipped down to the Pentagon basement many afternoons, changed into a T-shirt, sweat pants and headband, and spent a heart-thumping hour playing squash.”

****QUIET PLEASE, THIS IS THE LIBRARY (get away from the din of life)…. frank mccourt who has lived on his “angela’s ashes” for a thousand years has written a new book called “teacher man” in which he tells the story of when he was a teacher in the new york city school system. if you went to a school in the big apple, you will really appreciate this. published by scribner.

****THE STORY BEHIND THE STORY (what the media didn't tell you)....a local newspaper “newsday” which was caught faking its circulation numbers not too long ago and also published information and diagrams as to how to blow up a united states army vehicle (by pointing out its weak points) has been found to be secretly giving money to certain politicians which is certainly a violation of the “ethics” of a newspaper.

****THE EARL THEATER (it used to be on 161st street in the bronx. new york city has lots of rich people, but it has many more people living in slums thanks to the inaction of the city government and crooked landlords. SLUM

(please note: when playing a movie on your computer, you should diminish the size of the frame. if you have a problem, please contact us.

**AND THAT NEAT MOVIE HOUSE ALWAYS SHOWED A DOUBLE FEATURE AND HERE WE ARE WITH A SECOND FLICK. this is a wonderful trip around new york city in the famous yellow mobile conveyance lounge. HONK HONK

****THE HEY ABBOTT AWARD (an epistle about life).... “Plavix is made by Bristol-Myers and the company has agreed to pay Apotex US$40-million if it dropped its challenge and waited until Plavix's patent expired in 2011 before releasing a generic version.”…. that way, bristol myers can continue to charge outrageous prices to people who are unfortunate enough to have heart disease. have you ever seen a person who has a heart problem and doesn’t have the money for plavix? they make a small gurgling sound as they die.

****STOP THE MUSIC (do you know what tv show this theme came from?)….this sheriff had a deputy who had a limp. TV

****THE MOST WANTED TOUR IN THE BIG APPLE…. here are some happy visitors. you too can have a tour by going to TOUR INFO

**to listen to what other happy tourists had to say about the tour, just go AUDIO

**to see some additional happy tourists perform in short video productions go VIDEO

**to hear broadcast spots about some of the places where folks are taken to, listen to these commercials that were created for a "visit new york city promotion” at SPOTS

****CELEBRITY SIGHTING (media adulation)….bill murray and he was not chasing ghosts. STAR

****JOKE DU JOUR (told to me by the passengers)….this week the punch line is “i got three good leads” and you can hear it at AUDIO

****TO HEAR A RECENT GABBY CABBY BROADCAST, CLICK HERE. LISTEN

****TO SEE GABBY CABBY TV PRESENTATIONS, CLICK HERE. SEE

****LISTEN TO THE LATEST VERSION OF "NEW YORK, NEW YORK….it is written and sung by jack servello LISTEN

****AND ON THE FLIP SIDE….this is an intro promotion made by the folks at chnl in kamloops, british columbia. LISTEN

****NEW YORK CITY SHOWCASE (DESIGNER LINE OF CLOTHING)….see it all at SWELL