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11/20/05: The Week of
November 20, 2005
IF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE EXACT TIME IN NEW YORK CITY RIGHT NOW JUST CLICK
HERE. TIME
JUST PRESS THE START BUTTON IF YOU WANT TO HEAR THE MUSIC….
the song is “turkey in the straw” by bill jorgenson to get us all in the
mood for thanksgiving.
****NEW YORK CITY SHOWCASE (DESIGNER LINE OF CLOTHING)….see it all at SWELL
****LATE BREAKING NEWS (updated daily)…. it is our blog which changes every
day. this time you can click on TODAY
but in the future, you can go to it directly each day at
http://epistle.blogs.com/.
****TWO WARS ARE BETTER THAN ONE…. some people die, some people make
profits with u.s. army contracts. WAR
****THE GABBY CABBY FIELD OFFICE IS OPEN IN IRAQ…. this week’s exclusive
true tale is that united states soldiers have to buy their own weapons from
the locals in iraq and afghanistan. the picture shows american troops doing
what they always do. hurry up and wait.
****THANKS TO COUNTER
TERRORISM HYSTERIA, THE HANDICAPPED ARE IN FOR A HARD TIME….many people
have to travel with oxygen tanks because of life threatening breathing
problems. the evil ones who operate the transit system are talking about
banning them because they may blow up. the transit authority hierarchy is
composed of a bunch of slackers who are filled with nothing but hot air. we
should worry about them blowing up.
****THEY ARE A SOCIAL
PROBLEM. THEY ARE CHEATERS. THEY ARE CRIMINALS. GIVE THEM THE VOTE,
PLEASE….twenty percent of new york city’s population is known to be illegal
immigrants thanks to the rather suspicious love affair between george bush
president of the united states and his friend vincente fox, the pancho
villa of mexico. there are actually people in the big apple who want to
give the illegals the vote. PANCHO
****SPEAK NEW YAWK
(people will wonder at your sophistication)…. “gornisht” means “nothing.”
****OLD TIME RADIO (shows
you might be too young to remember)….this time it is a guy names fibber and
his wife mollie. THE
PAST
****THE SNEAKY CAMERA
(the hidden camera)….a growing collection of new yorkers are unaware that
they are being watched by a certain taxi driver. new ones are added from
time to time. take a peep at SNEAKY
****YENTA YACK FROM THE
BACK OF THE HACK (what they are talking about in the yellow mobile
conveyance lounge)….u.s. sailors from the aircraft carrier eisenhower were
paid $4,000 each to marry "illegal immigrants" who wanted to get
citizenship marrying the sailor boys. the hopeful ladies turned out to be
fbi agents. EISENHOWER
****THE STORY BEHIND
THE STORY (what the media didn't tell you)....the vendors who sell
christmas trees on the streets of the big apple steal the electricity for
their lights and their heaters. would you believe they also don’t pay
taxes, but collect sales tax?
****STAY INDOORS IF IT
RAINS (keep dry).... a wonderful exhibit about charles darwin is at the
american museum of natural history, the only museum in the city that has
always allowed strollers (like in baby carriages). it is located at central
park west and 81st street. UMBRELLA TIME
****THE EARL THEATER
(it used to be on 161st street in the bronx. now it is here and this
month's feature is "park avenue" which shows you how you are so
poor because you don't live on this avenue with the rich people. PARK
(please note: when
playing a movie on your computer, you should diminish the size of the
frame. if you have a problem, please contact us.
**AND THAT NEAT MOVIE
HOUSE ALWAYS SHOWED A DOUBLE FEATURE AND HERE WE ARE WITH A SECOND FLICK.
this is a wonderful trip around new york city in the famous yellow mobile
conveyance lounge. HONK
HONK
****THE HEY ABBOTT
AWARD (an epistle about life).... the winner is john potter who is no
relation to henry. this guy is the postmaster general of the united states.
EPISTLE
****TAKE A HIKE
(discovering where the famous and infamous spots are) …. greta garbo lived
at 2 beekman place in the 1930’s. GARBO
****CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF
THE BIZARRE (hard to believe)....there is an exhibition of dead bodies
(recently dead) at the south street seaport. these are people from china.
the logic presumably is that china has so many people who really cares if
some of them are killed and then put on display? the bodies cost $25
million for the showman who is putting on this very creepy sellout event. SEAPORT
****POSSIBILITIES
(could it not be?)....that lawyers really do thrive on other people’s
misery? lucky us. there must be lots of misery in new york city where we
have just gotten another 6800 new lawyers. we now have 100,000 in the big
apple. LAWYERS
****STOP THE MUSIC (do
you know what tv show this theme came from?)….the audio on the television
shows was better than the show most of the time. a hint is "it is a
western family." TV
****THE $1,000
INCOGNITO CAPER (a new challenge to the fat cats)....our current challenge
is to eduardo castro-wright, the ceo of walmart. we will pay him $1,000 to
visit incognito the walmart store in newburgh, new york where he will find
disgruntled employees, rude managers, lack of inventory and even a dirty
bathroom. we previously thought it was stupid for activists to try to keep
walmart’s out of new york city until we visited this store. we can abide
with eduardo using slave labr in china, but a dirty bathroom in new york
city? forgetaboutit. NEWBURGH
****AMMA'S KITCHEN (a
recipe)….this is what you would find cooking in a nyc home)…. turkey is
good for thanksgiving, but you need a quiet dessert. GOOD
EATS
****JASON BLAIR AWARD
(for the worst journalism during the previous week)….to all of the new york
city media who pushed and shoved to get a view of russell crowe taking a
walk on the charge of smashing a bellman at a hotel in the head with a
telephone. not to be confrontational, but russell is welcome to come to our
garage and hit jose in the head with a telephone. russell would not walk
away from jose as he did from the bellman and the schmuck district
attornery.
****THE MOST WANTED
TOUR IN THE BIG APPLE…. here are some happy visitors. you too can have a
tour by going to TOUR INFO
**to listen to what other
happy tourists had to say about the tour, just go AUDIO
**to see some
additional happy tourists perform in short video productions go VIDEO
**to hear broadcast
spots about some of the places where folks are taken to, listen to these
commercials that were created for a "visit new york city
promotion" at SPOTS
****CELEBRITY SIGHTING (media adulation)….we got to see him live and it was
worth the one hour wait….actually not. STAR
****JOKE DU JOUR (told
to me by the passengers)….this week the punch line is “that is ok i will
wait until they are in season” and you can hear it at AUDIO
****TO HEAR A RECENT
GABBY CABBY BROADCAST, CLICK HERE. LISTEN
****TO SEE GABBY CABBY
TV PRESENTATIONS, CLICK HERE. SEE
****LISTEN TO THE
LATEST VERSION OF "NEW YORK, NEW YORK….it is written and sung by jack
servello LISTEN
****NEW YORK CITY SHOWCASE (DESIGNER LINE OF CLOTHING)….see it all at SWELL
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