05/23/05: The Week of May 22, 2005 ****RIDING RHYTHMS….this is music that you can let play in the background as you read the true tales. it is ideal for the newsweek toilet true tale. the artist is kenny shore. LISTEN ****LATE BREAKING NEWS (updated constantly)…. TODAY ****THE NEWSWEEK MAGAZINE STORY ABOUT THE U.S. SOLDIERS FLUSHING THE KORAN DOWN THE TOILET WAS MADE UP….under the strict supervision of muslims a feasibility study was done to see if you could put a book the size of the koran down a new york city toilet. the answer is no. but, the newsweek magazine along with a picture of the author of their original potty story, michael isikoff, did flush quite well. does he also lie to his family about his late evenings? ****SADDAM’S COMMERCIAL FOR RADIO IS HERE FOR YOU TO LISTEN TO….there were two advertising agency guys in the back of the hack and they were talking about how he would do with an underwear commercial, so we decided to make one. if his lawyer decides to sue us, we will be represented by the law firm of schwartz, ginsberg and klopman. you can hear the commercial at BRIEF ****WE RETURNED THE PIRATE COPY OF STAR WARS THAT WE BOUGHT FOR THREE DOLLARS….the copy was sold to us by a chinese guy on canal street. the movie is horrible. it is boring. thank goodness we didn’t pay twenty bucks to see it in a movie theater. george lucas should be arrested. we got our money back. ****PHILOSOPHY FROM THE WORLD OF HACK (people will wonder at your sophistication)….”the international dialing code for antarctica is 672.” ****OLD TIME RADIO (shows you might be too young to remember)….this month's broadcast is "the aldrich family." THE PAST ****YENTA YACK FROM THE BACK OF THE HACK (what they are talking about in the yellow mobile conveyance lounge)….someone put a camera in a subway grate and was making a video of lady’s underwear up through their dresses. we don’t think this had anything to do with the saddam underwear caper. ****THE STORY BEHIND THE STORY (what the media didn't tell you)....why the business community in new york city is fighting the new plan to have two toilets for women to every one toilet for men. ****THE EARL THEATER (it used to be on 161st street in the bronx. now it is here and this month's feature is "sounds of the subway" which shows what some of the illegal aliens are doing. MEXICO (please note: when playing a movie on your computer, you should diminish the size of the frame. if you have a problem, please contact us. **AND THAT NEAT MOVIE HOUSE ALWAYS SHOWED A DOUBLE FEATURE AND HERE WE ARE WITH A SECOND FLICK. this is a wonderful trip around new york city in the famous yellow mobile conveyance lounge. HONK HONK ****THE HEY ABBOTT AWARD (an epistle about life)....this week it goes to a mean guy in missouri who wants to tell doctors what medicines to prescribe. his name is a barrett a. toan. EPISTLE ****TAKE A HIKE (discovering new york city)….or better yet, take a ride on one of the elevated subways. ****POSSIBILITIES (could it not be?)....that the judge who ruled it is ok to pinch a girl on her rear is some type of prevert himself? ****JASON BLAIR AWARD (for the worst journalism during the previous week)….the new york times thinks it is wonderful that a judge ruled that illegal aliens can have new york state drivers’ licenses. hopefully the editor of the times will get hit by an illegal driving a car without insurance. ****THE MOST WANTED TOUR IN THE BIG APPLE…. you too can have a tour by going to TOUR INFO **to hear what happy tourists had to say about the tour, just go AUDIO **to see the tourists perform in short video productions go VIDEO ****CELEBRITY SIGHTING (media adulation)…. the presley girl performing in city hall park. STAR ****JOKE DU JOUR (told to me by the passengers)….this week the punch line is “i will go back and get her” and you can hear it at AUDIO ****IF YOU WANT TO HEAR A RECENT GABBY CABBY BROADCAST, CLICK HERE. LISTEN ****IF YOU WANT TO SEE GABBY CABBY TV PRESENTATIONS, CLICK HERE. SEE