****RIDING RHYTHMS….this is music that you can let play in the background as you read the true tales. since the lead true tale this week is about baseball, this is just right. LISTEN

****LATE BREAKING NEWS (updated constantly)…. TODAY

****THIS IS WHERE YOU CAN FIND WHAT PRESIDENT BUSH IS DOING….MR. BUSH

****HERE IS WHERE YOU CAN FIND WHAT HIS HONEY, MRS. BUSH, IS DOING….MRS. BUSH

****TWO WARS ARE BETTER THAN ONE (some people die, some people make profits with u.s. army contracts.) WAR

****NEW YORK YANKEES HAVE LOST THEIR HATS….47,000 have been hijacked from a warehouse. we expect them to be on sale on canal street in a very short time. the way the thieves did the deed was so simple, it is so silly. YANKEES

****HOW MANY TREES DO WE HAVE IN THE BIG APPLE?....we are about to find out. a thousand volunteers are going to start counting and figuring out what is the money worth of the trees. this has never been done before and will probably disturb the birds. TREES

****HEY BUDDY WATCH WHAT YOU ARE DOING AS YOU BACK UP YOUR AUTO....a constant problem that is getting worse. people just knock down the fire hydrants not to mention putting a big dent in the rear of their car. once down on its side, a hydrant is of no use to either the fire department or the dogs. FIRE

****PHILOSOPHY FROM THE WORLD OF HACK (people will wonder at your sophistication)…."if a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle."

****OLD TIME RADIO (shows you might be too young to remember)….this month's broadcast is "the aldrich family." THE PAST

****THE NEW YORK QUICKEE (news report of a real incident requested by news services)….and you can hear it at AUDIO

****YENTA YACK FROM THE BACK OF THE HACK (what they are talking about in the yellow mobile conveyance lounge)….not only is the city giving out condoms, it is giving out colored ones.

****THE STORY BEHIND THE STORY (what the media didn't tell you)....as the new york times promotes the influx of illegal aliens, it neglects to mention that thousands of them are working at slave wages in sub-human conditions right here in the big apple. MEXICO

****STAY INDOORS IF IT RAINS (museum mania)....at the metropolitan museum of art which is at 81st and fifth avenue, there is an exhibition of clothing by coco chanel (1883-1971). you ladies will love it. MET

****THE EARL THEATER (it used to be on 161st street in the bronx. now it is here and this month's feature is "sounds of the subway" which shows what some of the illegal aliens are doing. MEXICO

(please note: when playing a movie on your computer, you should diminish the size of the frame. if you have a problem, please contact us.

**AND THAT NEAT MOVIE HOUSE ALWAYS SHOWED A DOUBLE FEATURE AND HERE WE ARE WITH A SECOND FLICK. this is a wonderful trip around new york city in the famous yellow mobile conveyance lounge. HONK HONK

****THE HEY ABBOTT AWARD (an epistle about life)....the question is asked, who is the bigger schmuck? jennifer wilbanks or the federal bureau of investigation? EPISTLE

****TAKE A HIKE (discovering new york city)….stay in the middle of the city, but go to sea. CENTRAL PARK

****JASON BLAIR AWARD (for the worst journalism during the previous week)….to all the newspapers in new york city that create the impression that people are reading them. in the last four years, circulation has decreased twenty percent.

****THE MOST WANTED TOUR IN THE BIG APPLE…. you too can have a tour by going to TOUR INFO

**to hear what happy tourists had to say about the tour, just go AUDIO

**to see the tourists perform in short video productions go VIDEO

****CELEBRITY SIGHTING (media adulation)….neil diamond with katie at the today show. STAR

****JOKE DU JOUR (told to me by the passengers)….this week the punch line is "waiting for autumn" and you can hear it at AUDIO

****IF YOU WANT TO HEAR A RECENT GABBY CABBY BROADCAST, CLICK HERE. LISTEN