****RIDING RHYTHMS….this is music from new york city that you can let play in the background as you read the true tales. it is from the state of montana where we know the air is a great deal cleaner. LISTEN

****LATE BREAKING NEWS (updated constantly)…. TODAY

****THIS IS WHERE YOU CAN FIND WHAT PRESIDENT BUSH IS DOING….MR. BUSH

****HERE IS WHERE YOU CAN FIND WHAT HIS HONEY, MRS. BUSH, IS DOING….MRS. BUSH

****TWO WARS ARE BETTER THAN ONE (some people die, some people make profits with u.s. army contracts.) WAR

****NEW YORKERS ARE ALL GOING TO DIE FROM THE POLLUTION….why worry about al qaida. detroit is doing a better job of dealing out death. the clear air task force says that car fumes are killing 2,000 new yorkers a year. also, pregnant ladies are in severe danger of having kids with abnormalities. the tourist board isn't worried, however, since the report clearly states that you have to live here for a few months to get affected. that is the good news?

****HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE NEW RAT COLLEGE?....it is called the "rodent integrated pest control academy." the city fathers have set it up to get rid of our rats….the animal kind. if you want to see rats, take a ride in a taxi late at night.

****THE DIRECTOR OF THE FBI IS WORRIED ABOUT ILLEGAL ALIENS….well, he should come to the big apple where the city fathers are estimating that we have about one million of the sneaky devils.

****PHILOSOPHY FROM THE WORLD OF HACK (people will wonder at your sophistication)….the verrazano bridge at the entrance to new york harbor is 4,260 feet and it sways.

****OLD TIME RADIO (shows you might be too young to remember)….this month's broadcast is ozzie and harriet. THE PAST

****YENTA YACK FROM THE BACK OF THE HACK (what they are talking about in the yellow mobile conveyance lounge)….the two former detectives that were arrested for whacking gangsters for their buddies in the mob. if convicted, they won't lose their $70,000 a year pensions thanks to the police union.

****THE STORY BEHIND THE STORY (what the media didn't tell you)....condolizza rice announces that she will not run for president. it would be nice if the media told you that her people were doing a survey of blacks in harlem recently and they found that the black voters weren't too thrilled with her.

****THE EARL THEATER (it used to be on 161st street in the bronx. now it is here and this month's feature is popeye
and his spinach.. WAR

(please note: when playing a movie on your computer, you should diminish the size of the frame. if you have a problem, please contact us.

**AND THAT NEAT MOVIE HOUSE ALWAYS SHOWED A DOUBLE FEATURE AND HERE WE ARE WITH A SECOND FLICK. this is a wonderful trip around new york city in the famous yellow mobile conveyance lounge. HONK HONK

****THE HEY ABBOTT AWARD (an epistle about life)....charles sturcken is the spokesman for the city's department of environmental protection. with people like charlie working for us citizens, we will truly all die of pollution. his department only goes after the innocent. EPISTLE

****TAKE A HIKE (discovering new york city)…. this is the place where superman hung out with lois lane. TAKE A HIKE

****CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE BIZARRE (people are people)....the shopping cars are disappearing from the supermarket even though the sign says that the wheels will lock if removed past a certain point.

****JASON BLAIR AWARD (for the worst journalism during the previous week)….the associated press hangs out with the terrorists in iraq and takes their photos up close. maybe they even give the bad guys copies of the photos for their family albums.

****POSSIBILITIES (could it not be?)....the free condoms that glow in the dark that the city is going to give out will make your member fall off? stop laughing. this is not the joke du jour.

****THE MOST WANTED TOUR IN THE BIG APPLE…. you too can have a tour by going to TOUR INFO

**to hear what happy tourists had to say about the tour, just go AUDIO

**to see some of the tourists perform in a short video productions go VIDEO

****CELEBRITY SIGHTING (media adulation)….matthew modine on the streets of new york after shooting some law and order stuff. STAR

****JOKE DU JOUR (told to me by the passengers)….this week the punch line is "he won't dare to cough. and you can hear it at AUDIO

**SPECIAL NOTE….please go to PUFFER for a really inspirational true tale about a very fine radio broadcaster.

****IF YOU WANT TO HEAR A RECENT GABBY CABBY BROADCAST, CLICK HERE. LISTEN

****IF YOU WANT TO SEE GABBY CABBY TV PRESENTATIONS, CLICK HERE. SEE